Say What You Mean
by MirrorDede
Summary: Gil makes the mistake of getting dressed in front of Break. He thought Break was blind...but maybe Emily isn't?


Request from the PH kink meme:

"Break/Gilbert

Break's blind so Emily provides a helpful running commentry, doesn't have to be smut, can just be Break hitting on Gilbert or something."

_Nice idea, let's do it…It is totally going to be crack, but you knew that, right?_

_FYI there's no actual sex here, just some adult concepts, but I thought I should give it an M rating to be safe. _

_Context: __Break and Emily are over at Gilbert's place._

**Say What You Mean**

"I think someone's just come in, Emily," said Break, setting down his teacup. "Who could it be?"

"It's Seaweed Head!" said Emily, perched on Break's shoulder. "And he looks like he's up to no good!"

"Why do you say that?"

"His face looks guiiiilty…get it?" said the doll. "Gil-ty! Hahaha!"

"Break," said Gilbert, irritated. "I just came out of the…bathroom. That's all. I told you before I went in that I was taking a shower."

"He must have been jerking off in there!" accused Emily.

"Ah, I'll bet you're right Emily," said Break, taking a bite of cake. "He was gone so long I almost forgot about him."

Gilbert wrapped his towel around himself more tightly.

Break continued, "I'm sure Gilbert-sama has a lot of pent up needs to take care of."

"What would you know about it?" snipped Gilbert, opening his dresser.

"More than you think…" sing-songed the white-haired man. "I wonder if Gilbert uses soap to slick things up…"

"…or if he prefers dry friction?" added Emily.

Gilbert blushed furiously. He had been about to cast off his towel and get dressed, but was suddenly so self-conscious he was having second thoughts about getting undressed in front of Break – even if he was blind – and Emily – even if she was just a doll.

Emily said, "You make me so jealous when you play with that doll between your legs instead of me!"

"Oh Emily, I don't mean to make you jealous," cooed Break. "But there are some things you just can't do for me. For one thing, your mouth isn't big enough."

_What the fuck?_ thought Gilbert.

With Emily and Break arguing, Gilbert figured they were distracted and quickly slipped off his towel.

"Oh! Oh!" screamed Emily. "Gilbert's naked!"

Gilbert froze and his eyes nearly fell out of his head. He grabbed his underwear and put in on as fast as he possibly could.

_I thought with Break being blind he wouldn't even notice anything_, he thought, slipping on his trousers. _I thought Emily was really just him, making her seem to talk. _

"I've never seen Gilbert move soooo fast!" said Emily.

Gilbert snatched a shirt off a rack and slipped his arms into it. _Wait a minute…don't tell me…_

Gilbert sputtered,

"Is that…thing…Emily…really alive? Can it _see_?"

"Wouldn't you like to know, huh?" Break put his arms at his waist and stuck his tongue out.

"Break!" yelled Gilbert, fumbling with the buttons on his shirt. "Stop messing with me!"

"Oh, Gilbert's all hot under the collar now!" said Emily. "The veins are sticking out on his forehead!"

Gilbert seized Break by the front of his shirt and shook him.

"Are you blind or can you actually see? Answer me Break!"

"Please let go of me," cried Break, mock-whimpering. "I'm just a fragile old man."

"Fragile my ass," grumbled Gil, gritting his teeth.

"Oh! Elder abuse!" screamed Emily. Now that he was so close, Gilbert was sure the voice was coming from Emily, not Break, and it was seriously freaking him out.

He let go of Break's shirt and ripped Emily off his shoulder, throttling the doll with his hands.

"Help! Help!" cried Emily. "I'm afraid!"

"Oh, don't worry Emily," said Break, smoothing down his shirt front. "I doubt Gilbert could abuse you any worse than I already have."

Gil shoved Emily's head into a sock, put her into his sock drawer and closed it.

**And that's the THE END if you are faint-hearted**

PostScript (not for the faint-hearted):

"Help?" called Emily, her voice muffled. "Am I in someone's butt? It's dark in here…like somebody's butt. Help?"


End file.
